happy birthday buddy

six years old today. isn't that crazy?

happy birthday buddy.

you truly are spectacular and so special today and every day. the best thing about your birthday is how much you love that it's your birthday. you know you're special today, that you shouldn't have to make your bed and should be able to do whatever your heart desires all day long. we'll see about that.

as you can see, you've just lost your first tooth and this is pretty cool to you. you treat it like a social stamp of acceptance -- lost tooth = sit at cool table at school? it was so important to you to get the tooth out, i was unbelievably impressed at your pain tolerance as i yanked, twisted and pulled at that tooth. usually when faced with the idea of pain you're kind of a wuss.

you're funny like that. just when i think i've got you figured out, you always throw a curve ball. a complex person you are. you're incredibly stubborn and competitive. you're compassionate and it is clear that acceptance is your motivator. to be acknowledged and cared about is a high priority to you. you seem measure your self worth in the most odd of ways. it matters so much to you who is the oldest in the room, who is the tallest, who can supposedly run the fastest or color the best. maybe this is common for kids your age? it drives me crazy. who's milk is the fullest, who ate the fastest, who woke up first or who slept in the latest ... the winner of the later two depends on whether you woke up first or last on that particular day. you have an unbelievable memory ... mouth dropping at times. you're extremely observant. you could easily direct me while driving to any location we've been to before, you know every one of mine and dads friends names, their kids names, you can recall each and every moment spent with these people in detail. you know all of your classmates names; first, middle and last as well as when their birthday is, the names of their siblings, their favorite food or favorite color, where they live, whatever you've learned about them so far in school. but you can't remember to take your dirty clothes to the laundry room after you shower. weird.

i've said before that you challenge me so well. and i don't mean for that to make you feel badly. i truly believe that you're my biggest challenge because you're so much like myself. it is a constant struggle for power between the pair of us and usually you win which leaves me terribly frustrated and tense almost always. one of my goals this year is to quit yelling so much ... my biggest frustration is knowing that the way you act is a result of the way that i react yet i still struggle so much to control my own emotions when we're having an off day. i love you so much and hope that you'll continue to be patient with me as i grow as your mommy. when we had our pictures taken recently we ended up with at least 80 of just you. these two might not be the best pictures out of the bunch but they are definitely most reflective of you're personality. i see you when i look at these pictures.

you are the best big brother. yes, you try really hard to manipulate your sister but you back down quickly when you realize it's not working. you're a leader which is great especially when you recognize the times when you need to be a follower. you love little gavin so much and take on the role of caretaker immediately when i leave the room. i have a feeling you'll always be the protector of your siblings.

tonight we'll have a small party for your birthday, just us, with presents and cupcakes. we've decided that "friend" birthday parties will be an every-other-year occurrence so this is our first "off" year but we will go out with the rest of the family this weekend for a little bowling and a star wars clone wars birthday cake which you can't stop talking about.

happy birthday to you!